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Friday, October 29, 2004

Electing Couches

I don't have my nightly picture ready right now, so I figured I would throw in one the best describes my current mood. we went couch shopping today. I knew I wanted Microfiber, so it narrowed the field nicely. We went to three stores, well four but the mall didn't count. If you saw our mall you would agree. Edwards furniture was our first stop and we found a sofa, love seat, chair and automan for $1900 which is a little over budget. See my in-laws gave us money to buy couches as a house warming present. Did I mention that we moved from SLC to a valley up north? Yeah, well we did, we build a house and moved in, but more about that later.
So we have a budget and I wasn't sure we would actually find a living room set the amount we have. BUT on our third stop, we found a full set (sofa, love seat, chair and automan) for $1599. Which exceeds our budget a little, but they are having a no tax sale this weekend! HURRAY! To stay on the safe side, we are going to shop some more tomorrow and check out some other stores.

What's interesting is, I was thinking about how many people have sat their dirty butts on my couch. Let me tell you, I sat my butt on every microfiber couch and chair I saw. I left little bits of DNA all around town today. I would never have really thought about this before now, but I've recently become a CSI fan-addict. My husband and I solve the mysteries before the show hits half way. We're crazy, I know.

If only people knew that the secret of life have fun. We're pretty good at having fun.
I've babbled on too long and I still have to go get my camera and download my nightly picture to add it for the day. brb

Thursday, October 28, 2004


Babies, I love babies. I was put on this planet to be a mom. However the stars are not lining up for me. My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for the last two or three years. Before that, we weren't trying but we weren't preventing. There is a reason I'm having such a hard time conceiving. I have PCOS, Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome. I also have an abnormally small left ovary and an abnormally large right ovary. We've tried Clomid but that didn't work, it made me gain 50 or so pounds. Gee thanks, I needed that! Most of the time, I'm optimistic or at least I think I'm really truely optimistic. It may be denial though. There are times when I feel like I know I'll never get pregnant and I'm only kidding myself. Normally, I know myself and what I'm really feeling, but this really has troubled me. I really don't know how I'm feeling. It's possible that my brain is blocking out my real feelings because it is so painful. This all sounds crazy as I'm writing it, but that's what is so messed up about it. Tears well up when I see babies or my friends with their children. I quickly dry my eyes and put on a smile and soak up as much time with their kids as possible. I sit here and attempt to really feel what I'm feeling, but there's a brick wall, nothing. I know I'm dying inside just thinking about the possibility of never being a mom, but I feel like I'm stopping myself from really feeling it. Because otherwise, I would be crying my eyes out all day long. Could I really be protecting myself from my true feelings? Wouldn't I have to have a mutiple personality to do this? Or maybe I'm really optimistic, or maybe I KNOW that I will have a baby someday, our lives just aren't ready for it yet. I guess if it's meant to happen, it will happen.

The picture above is my best friends 2 1/2 yr old daughter, Pashaince.

Wednesday, October 27, 2004


My last and first entry was quite negative so I wanted to end the day with a positive note.
Everyday I take pictures of the sunset. It's my current obsession. I watch the sunrise from my back porch and the sunset from my front porch. We have the best views! It's one of the main reasons we bought our house. We live right dab in the middle of the Rocky Mountains which provides the best views in the world. There is only one other place in the world I would want to live and that's Bellingham, WA. Bellingham is my happy place! Hopefully in five years that's where we'll live.
This sunset is from a few days ago, so beautiful!

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

Need to start somewhere

We all have to start somewhere. It's taken me a while to get started with this but wanted to start off with a bang. I'm not feeling so "bangy" so I figured I was start here. Winter is coming and I hate it! I hate snow, I hate the cold, I hate when it's wet, I hate all the drivers on the road that don't know how to drive in the snow. I hate that I have to take Prozac during the winter just to get out of bed everyday. I can't wait until Spring!

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