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Saturday, November 01, 2008


Maybe this will help get me back to posting? Or it's just another expection I have for myself that I won't live up to. Geeze just typing that sentence made me question my cup half empty/full or completely empty mentality. Maybe it's the fact that I'll be 32 years old this month and I'm no closer to fulfilling my life goals. ie. Being a mama to a living child or two.
I've been reading my journals from high school and other then the fact that some of the things I wrote are just down right silly, I'm shocked at how troubled I was. It's amazing how much I had forgotten! All I really remember is how much fun we had, all the crazy adventures, those way too drunk nights or all night trips. I remember the hard times, how depressed I was but I guess when recollecting those stories for new friends now, I don't remember how suicidal I was, seemingly ALL THE TIME! I was Screaming for help and it seemed no one was listening.
I'm thinking about sharing some of those posts here. Just trying to build up the courage. You never know who reads this blog (mom) and I have to be OK with really Putting It Out There.
Stay tuned.

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